mind escapis

i have a lot of things going on my mind lately

and as a person who rarely have any thoughts *lmao*

this is suffocating

i find my brain get tired easily

though all i was doing was scrolling the screen mindlessly

(to distract myself, yes)

we all do this though.

i read somewhere that writing is a good practice to gather our thoughts

it says that by jot down your thoughts, concern, ideas

your mind actually visualize it and specified it (if any)

in a way that it reconstruct and reorganized our thoughts by visualizing it

through letters

through pictures if you drew it

similar concept

the key is to visualize it

and i realized one thing

that ive been doing this since ages

these blogs i meant

all the posting and drafts yang tidak sesuai untuk tontonan umum

although i've had in some point in life stopped doing it (read: now)

i cant remember what were my coping mechanism while im on hiatus from writing

but to think that it is always that one thing yang trigger aku

it is safe to say ive always kept it bottled up inside

tak try nak confront

sebab rasa taknak fikir

nak lari je 

---

berbalik pada tadi,

tapi most of the time

teknik ni digunapakai hanya sewaktu kita catit notes while lecture

yang tujuannya mostly untuk menggarap our understanding nak bagi melekat kat otak

but really its not like we have concern about it

means kita bukan terganggu dengan the ideas

it just we are intrigued to have that knowledge ya know

so actually lain senanye dua benda ni

not @ me who wrote this post preaching on "mind escapism" while her mind are also concerning on other things but shes still prioritize writing this posting instead of gathering her thoughts,,,,,

how irony

pfftt

(nak ngelak lagi ke tu ;-;)

having my mind on other things

weh fr though i really encourage you

to write ur feelings

an inexpensive therapy i would say

lepas menulis ur feelings and mind get cleared up

u see things in a clearer vision now

all things got organized

dengan hanya menulis sahaja

and to actually having the luxury to reread it again

is a game changing

idk how to put it

tapi it somehow take you back on ur state of mind at that time

and you get to understand it differently

from another lens and perspective

and wonder wow i manage to get through this while i was in such state of mind 

(it is a case to case basis tho)

unintentionally

it somehow records ur progress on how u preach things ya know

and this typpa of writing tak semestinya kena blog begini

ig stories/feed ke twitter serve the same purpose

some are very vocal with their views and feelings

tak takut nak lontarkan pendapat ke public

tapi aq tacod

jadi saya begini jela

memberontak dengan tulisan bantuan papan kekunci tanpa ada audience

hahsjahj perang dengan diri sendiri ja